Snake Girl
by The Wolf That Got Away
Summary: A oneshot story exploring the thoughts of Nagini during her life as the Circus Arcanus' resident freak show.


" _I'm scared._ **"**

" _I don't know what else to do._ **"**

" _I want to run away, but no idea where to go._ **"**

" _I feel like the snake inside me is going to take over._ "

" _I lose my mind piece by piece each passing day._ "

Those were my thoughts for days to no end. They prevented me from sleeping, from doing anything remotely useful outside of my circus life. Every time I looked at myself in the mirror, I had to keep reminding myself that I'm Nagini, the enchanting snake girl. A circus performer. A walking freak show. Not something unnatural or monstrous.

But it was the unmistakable truth that I was already a monster. Every soul who had ever witnessed me on stage simply didn't know of it... not yet.

Look at me, traveling all over Europe in a magical circus show, Circus Arcanus. From Netherlands to Luxemburg to France, we wizards and witches who were already outcasts from the greater wizarding society itself performed a variety of fantastic attractions before the ignorant eyes of Muggles, selling them the idea of magic tricks made real that only circus performers knew how to do it.

As for me, Nagini the snake girl... my role was quite simple.

A caged enclosure was my stage. I've been familiar with the drill. Walk in there, shed my coat to reveal my more promiscuous appearance... and twist my body left and right until I transformed into a giant python that people would gawk at in amazement. At times, the ringmaster would throw something for me to eat, like a chicken carcass or a large rabbit just so that the Muggles could see me gulping down the dead animals in mere seconds.

Muggles called it a miracle and elaborate magic trick at the same time, and they loved it. I saw it as a curse, and I fear it deeply more than anything.

" _I won't be a human anymore._ "

" _Will there be a release from this torment?_ "

" _I feel trapped._ "

" _I feel exposed._ "

" _I feel defenseless._ "

" _I feel..._ "

" _I..._ "

There were times in my life when my throat would produce a snake's hiss instead of human language. Most of the time, people including my fellow performers wouldn't notice it, too busy with their own tasks. Once in a while, someone would look at me, correctly deducing that I was the source of that hissing sound, but too afraid to ask anything.

There were times in my pitiful existence where I experienced this primal urge to just transform and live the rest of my live as a snake I frequently turned into. Days turned to weeks, months turned to years, and more of my humanity disappeared as I traveled along with the Circus Arcanus, continuing to entertain the unwary Muggles with my shapeshifting power.

This blood curse... would it be the end of my life?

Would I shift into my snake form indefinitely, with no way to change back into my human form?

If that's true, then what about my distant comrades? Would they be aware of what would happen to me? Would they even bother trying to help me stop this curse before it's too late?

For years to no end, I'd wait for a miracle that might somehow put me out of this misery. I tried befriending others, of course, but our relationship were not long-lasting as one by one the older star attraction of the circus left over the years, replaced by new wizards and witches, many were underaged, whom I have yet to establish genuine interaction. Despite my best attempt to present a friendly nature in front of them, deep down I always seem to feel drowning, clawing for breath while others blissfully ignore me.

And so, I kept on serving in the circus, twisting myself over and over as Muggles all over Europe relentlessly gawked at me... at my serpentine form, either praising me for my 'amazing magical stunt' or outright declaring me as a 'money-seeking fraud'.

" _I can't keep this hidden forever._ "

" _I'll have to make a choice someday._ "

" _Will there be happiness for me?_ "

" _Either let myself stuck in here or get out of here._ "

" _I feel like I'm not good enough._ "

" _I feel violated._ "

" _I feel..._ "


End file.
